Things I Didn't Realize Were Actually Quite Weird

So, meeting new people, talking to them, doing the whole "share a story" dance, I realized that there are some things that I took as normal that are, in fact, not normal at all.

Such as:

• My mother used to tell us about the "Halloween Witch," who demanded half your Halloween candy in order to be sated. So, each Halloween, when I got home, I would separate out my favorite candies and give my tithe to the Halloween Witch. Apparently, this is not a beloved holiday tradition of most children.
• I like the feel and smell and kind of the taste of tree sap. I guess most people don't.
• I am a girl, but much prefer to be blunt and straightforward rather than expect someone else to get what I'm thinking. This is why I don't hang out with all that many girls, typically.
• I completely, utterly fail at playing most video games, because I never had them growing up. Now, when I go to parties, and someone breaks out Super Smash Bros, every other person there can kick my ass. Even children. Especially children. I totally missed the part where video games were a normal past time. I read a lot of books. Whittled some knives out of wood using a knife made out of metal.
• Oh, and apparently whittling things is weird. But you'll all be sorry when I am able to fashion toys and tools after the apocalypse.
• I never learned how to swim, or whistle. I thought maybe more people would not be able to do these things, but turns out, from my incredibly varied and accurate sampling, that no, everyone else can swim and whistle. Some at the same time.
• I think you shouldn't dumb down your language for kids. I mean, their brains are like little sponges, right? The perfect time for language acquisition. Why should they learn baby talk from you when they could be learning to speak like an adult? A smart adult, even. But it seems most people either think their kids are stupid, or they just don't want to have to answer "What does that mean?" every few sentences.
• Oh, and I guess once you get to college it's not okay to like fantasy novels the most still. You have to be all educated and say you like Walden. Well screw Thoreau. I'm going to go read some books that have sword fights and magic in them. I'd like to see mamby-pamby Thoreau try to fight a dragon.

-- Jazz